Ok, so today I’m sharing with you 5 ways of showing love to your kids. As mums who are constantly busy and multi-tasking, it’s easy to feel that we need to show love in extravagant ways, such as a fantastic holiday away, or a massive Christmas present.
But I’ve found that the best ways of showing love to your kids are actually very simple. That’s because they have really simple needs: to be delighted in, paid attention to, and to be nurtured.
Would they love a trip to Disney World? Of course! If you have the means and the time, go for it. But if you don’t, rest assured that it’s not the big and the flashy things that happen occasionally that will show them love but the simple details of everyday life.
So here are 5 simple ways of showing love to your kids. 🙂
5 ways of showing love to your kids
Ok, this may sound simplistic, but it really isn’t. We really do underestimate the power of a smile to help someone feel loved.
Do you smile when you pick up your kids from school? Do you smile at them while you’re eating dinner together? If you’re not sure, just go ahead and try and do it more often.
The thing is, we need to be intentional about smiling at our kids. And that is also especially true for days when we’re feeling stressed. So often as parents, if we’re not careful we can live under the stress and strain of being in one of the busiest stages of our lives and we can forget to simply be with our children and relax.
Smiling not only causes us to feel better due to a release of endorphins, but it is also contagious which means that ultimately it will help your children feel happier and it will help defuse tensions.
When you smile at someone you are communicating pleasure in them and love.
So go ahead and smile more!
Physical touch is so important for children. It helps them feel secure, nurtured, and loved.
It’s not by chance that newborns need to be held and carried for the first few months of life. Being close to momma, hearing her heartbeat, and smelling her scent, provide security in a yet-to-discovered world.
Children also need that security. Often they go through many new and different experiences, and having a cuddle from mum is just what they need to calm down, and feel secure and loved.
3. Focused time and attention
By this, I mean that you schedule time alone with your kids (without people who aren’t from your household, for instance, extended family and friends).
I know a few parents who don’t spend time alone with their kids, and while I know this is perhaps a conscience issue, I really do believe in the benefits of giving your kids your focused attention.
And that also means putting your phone down.
You see, we don’t want to communicate to our children that paying attention to them is less important than whatever we’re doing on our phones.
Let’s say your kids are telling you about their day at school, and while they’re still mid-sentence your phone buzzes and you rush to get it. Unless there really is an emergency situation that you’re aware of and that justifies this, what this attitude effectively communicates is that your virtual life is more important than your kids.
So we must find ways of reducing our screen time when our kids are around in order to set those boundaries and show them that they really are our priority.
If all the time you spend with them is constantly interrupted by conversations with other adults, phones buzzing, or work commitments, your children may end up resenting you for not giving them focused time.
I think this is particularly hard for us as mums because often we’re so busy doing stuff, it’s hard to unwind to the point where we can simply play with our kids. It is possible, however. And that’s coming from me!
I’m one of those people who find it hard to relax at home when the kids are awake as I focus on housework and chores.
But I know how much my children value it when I play with them so I implement strategies to help me relax and get into play mode.
One thing that helps me is taking the kids out and playing in a park nearby. The other thing that helps me personally is to reminisce about the games I used to play as a child, and that helps me get into a playful mood, and forget my adult responsibilities for a while.
I’ve found that my children actually really like it when I take the time to teach them something practical like cooking, shopping or looking after the plants.
It takes patience, time, and attention, but it’s definitely worth it because working together helps us to bond, and when we teach our kids skills we end up re-learning too (ever noticed how you learn something better when you teach it?) which helps us feel like a team discovering the world together.
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